We love passionate advocates. The ultimate alpha mom is most certainly an advocate: she gives her time and money to her pet causes. In her enthusiasm, she may even try to inspire her friends and family to do the same. Alpha mom advocates promote all kinds of great causes: they become Court Appointed Special Advocates to give a voice to abused or neglected children. They found organizations to support special needs adults and children. They mentor children with incarcerated parents.
And then there are the slacktivists. These are your typical Facebook soap boxers. They repost images to spread autism, breast cancer, and multiple sclerosis awareness. We don’t really get it: is the point that by increasing awareness, someone else will be inspired to do what you weren’t (namely, becoming an advocate)? But, it’s fairly harmless, as long as it doesn’t make people who otherwise would have, you know, actually done something, become complacent.
And then, finally, there are the beta bullies. Oh man. They promote depriving mothers of feeding choices pushing for Rx-only formula. They claim that disposable diapers are dangerous and poisoning babies. They insist that sleep-training is dangerous and harmful, and something that only bad parents would do, despite contrary evidence. They tut-tut at all sorts of traditional parenting hacks for not being “gentle parenting.” This crap is plain and simple assholery disguised as slacktivism that they pretend is advocacy. It’s ugly, it’s cruel and no one wants to hear it (except for people who just want their choices validated by their Facebook feed).
It’s not enough for these moms to make their parenting choices and enjoy their families. They need you to comply with their browbeating. You must be educated, nagged and guilted until you understand that their choices are right and yours are deeply misguided. And if you don’t fall in line, they feel so, so sad for your babies.